Why it has always to be thou my loudest cry..which peels my whole skin and makes me vulnerable inside-out by the forbidden boomerang effect ..why my soul can't find my peace while after trying all the paths good or bad to keep thou behind,still I suffocating for the same stage through all these years the same way..afraid to admit afraid to let go afraid to exist afraid for rejection..but all I can do is to drown in to an ocean of silence by force, closing all my senses which other wise may find a path some how crossing all limit to reach back to thy life..And this all for what..knowing and feeling always unwanted and unwelcomed..to the damn strangeness..craving for something never actually existed in thy lyf..but which always was my reason for living..thou can now be my loudest cry caught in my throat..never able to come out never able to go down in heart..to make me realise nothing to exists..in this fake world..